Let’s have an honest discussion about lies. I’ll start by admitting that I too, find myself lying, even if just a little, every once in a while.

Let me explain. Someone (let’s assume it’s me) stands in line at the DMV to renew their driver’s license, as we all do every four years. At the window I am asked to verify my information. Name, current address, weight… Wait! The number showing represents a physical state I have not been in for years, and which I have never bothered to update during previous renewals. The clerk is looking at me, people are waiting. I need to decide: say nothing and leave it the way it is, or update it? Come on! Why are you taking so long?

We all face similar situations in our daily life. Small truth-bending, tiny lie inserting, minute alteration of facts, all aimed at harnessing a situation, supporting a view, moving things forward in an easier, seamless way. It is for a good cause, we say to ourselves, and hurts no one. My true weight isn’t critical for anyone to know. When did any officer ever pointed at someone’s driver’s license during a traffic stop and said, “Excuse me, sir/ma’am, but this number looks wrong”? There are, of course, better and more precise ways to identify a person, and the ‘guess your weight’ booth at the fair method is not it.

So, when does any inaccurate statement become a problem? Will it become true if millions of people believe it? And what happens when fallacy is uncovered? Would the resulting embarrassment be worth its original purpose? We live in an age where almost every detail of life is recorded. Never before has mankind had a more precise and accurate recording of its history, from the very personal to the utmost global level. Yet the same technology that gathers and disseminates this information is also employed to soil these records with false narratives and outright lies. If public figures take liberty with factual information to serve their cause, who would care about my weight on my driver’s license?

Well, we all should.

Bending reality to suit one’s own comfort levels and needs is common and understood. We do it when stating an inaccurate weight on our DL, and when we say to ourselves, we are happy with our job and our relationship when in fact we are not. There may be a good reason to state that, but it does not justify or excuse it. Doing so is missing an important component – measure. An inaccuracy is created to support a need, but stands at odds with reality. Instead of addressing the issue or seeking help to change it, we slowly debase the reality in which we live in. Imagine if everyone stated the wrong weight on their driver’s license. The weight data bracket would be rendered useless. Any fact treated this way finds similar fate, and together they add to an undependable reality. It is best to rely your happiness on truth and honesty, from your health and wealth to your relationships and career.

If one is dishonest with themselves, they can be so with others. The falsehood does not change the fact it is riffing on the truth, and may only offer limited comfort to the person. The more one does it, the more comfortable they become with it, and the more they’d do it, to the point of losing the sense of what is real and what is not. We all wish to look better, younger, and more successful. If you want to improve something about yourself, make a commitment and do the work to reach that goal. You will love your real self much better than the imaginary one.

And lastly, since we are in the season of giving, I would like to present you with this special offer. It can be a great gift to give yourself or a loved one. For anyone who is looking to make a change in their life, this can be the best gift of the year.

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